Affectionately known as the "world's greatest job," tanning butler duties include strolling around the luxury hotel pool and rubbing attractive people (and presumably unattractive people, but let's not think about that) with complimentary Hampton Sun products from 12pm to 4pm.
The tanning butlers wear signature "Tanning Butler" t-shirts -- so don't believe that guy in a Speedo who's pretending to be a hotel employee -- and are armed with various SPFs, Evian spritzers and sunglasses cleaner in a custom-made holster.
"Good afternoon, I'm the Tanning Butler," they've been instructed to say. "Can I offer you some complimentary sunscreen? If you like, I can apply it to your back and shoulders that might burn easily, as well."
In my fantasy, that line is delivered with a very sexy accent. I hope the Ritz-Carlton's HR department is reading this.
"This modern twist on the English butler is beyond guests' expectations," says Michelle Payer, creator of The Tanning Butler. "It's a light-hearted service we created to cater to our guests as they sunbathe by providing an unexpected, luxury service they won't see anywhere else in the world."
An added perk of the profession? Celebrity rubbing. Jessica Simpson, Nick Lachey, Johnny Knoxville and Vivica A. Fox are just a few names the Ritz-Carlton, South Beach claims to have tanned.
If you're interested in staying at The Ritz-Carlton, South Beach, Miami's newest oceanfront hotel -- "a complete restoration of an original 1953 Morris Lapidus-designed landmark hotel in the city's historic Art Deco district" -- visit the website to book.
Alternatively, click here for job openings.