The chatter about Michelle Obama's shorts last week was deafening. Google the subject and 9 million entries pop up. Well, make that 9 million and one, including this post. It blew away President Obama's mom jeans episode last month documented by only 1 million entries.

People care deeply about the way people dress. But it's a mystery why. Why the hell do we care? I mean, it's kind of embarrassing that we paid so much attention to a lousy pair of shorts. And modest ones at that.

Something in our primitive dinosaur brains kicked in when we saw Michelle Obama step off Air Force One. We weren't sure if it was okay. Eventually, the media asked us to weigh in and, after thinking about it with our evolved brains, 80 percent of us said it was fine.

Catch Madonna in a pair of shorts and even our dinosaur brains would be nonplussed. Style and cut would be debated, sure, but impropriety would never come up.

Why? Because clothes are inextricably linked to identity. Rationally, how can we whine that Michelle Obama wears shorts when most of us wear shorts? But, deep down, we don't want her to be like us. We want to see an aspirational image of the First Lady descending from the most exclusive airplane in the world. We want Jackie O. Or at least a business-like version...which Michelle Obama is most of the time.

Maybe not in a skinny pair True Religions, but we'd kinda like to see President Obama in a slimmer pair of jeans, say from Lucky Brand Jeans. That dovetails with our image of him as a hip, modern guy. Mom jeans don't fit, both figuratively and literally.

Winifred Grace may sound like a stodgy name, but designs look like they're straight out of Desperately Seeking Susan.

Winifred Grace Gundeck was born in Miami, and though she now operates out of Chicago, you can see the influence of the ocean in her designs. She started Winifred Grace in 2003 -- but she's been designing with flowers, feathers, ribbons, and beads since age 8.

We especially love the fringed rhinestones, as seen on the Pink Rhinestone and Pearl Fringe Necklace at right. This 17" treasure of clear crystal clusters, pink alabaster Swarovski crystals and rhinestones on an oxidized sterling silver chain with freshwater pearls and 14k gold filled accents is $405, and we're pretty sure that with an 80s tutu and messy hair, you'd look just like Madonna wearing it.

This foxy stuff cleans up nice, too, though. Picture this with a pearl-white dress or the matching bracelet with a couture gown. Check out the gallery for more sophisticated looks such as "draping," and visit Winifred Grace to shop the whole collection!

A couple weeks back we wrote that Prince Harry would be competing in in the second annual Veuve Clicquot Manhattan Polo Classic during his first official visit to the U.S. In the match, which took place this past weekend on Governor's Island, the Prince's Sentebale polo team triumphed over Ralph Lauren's Black Watch, captained by Polo model Nacho Figueras, five goals to four. VIP spectators at the historic event who enjoyed afternoon tea prepared by Sandro Micheli, executive pastry chef at Adour Alain Ducasse at The St. Regis New York, included Madonna and her male model pal Jesus Luz, Kate Hudson, Louis Vuitton designer Marc Jacobs, Donna Karan, Chloe Sevigny and LL Cool J.

Nudes of Madonna have made their way to the auction block before but none as unflattering as this rendition of Madonna with her ex-husband Guy Ritchie painted by Peter Howson. The oil painting shows Madonna with a large belly, no neck and meaty arms being pawed by monstrous version of Ritchie set against a cityscape. The painting is owned by a private collector and is estimated to sell for £15,000 - 22,000 at McTear's auctioneers in Glasgow, Scotland on Saturday May 30. Madonna owns several of Howson's paintings but she probably won't be bidding on this one.

Today's home, Castillo del Lago is one of the legendary homes tucked up into the Hollywood Hills. It was originally built for oil explorer Patrick Longdon but more famously was later the home to mobster Bugsy Siegel who may have turned the castle into a speakeasy. The story gets interesting again when Madonna picks up the home in 1993 for around $5 million and her brother sets to work decorating it for another $3 million. Those rather interesting stripes on the outside? Blame Madonna's brother who says in his memoir that he got the idea from a little church in Portofino. The home has nine bedrooms and the property roams approximately three acres on a hilltop with views of the Hollywood reservoir.

The interior has tall beamed ceilings, cool tile floors, and has a huge spiral staircase for ascending the home's many levels (there is also an elevator). The bright white kitchen includes a vintage O'Keefe and Merrit stove and twin SubZero refrigerator/freezers. For those who prefer a little less light there are also a few rooms that look cool and dark including a long library, paneled billiard room and some sort of cozy space draped in multicolored fabrics. As you might imagine, the tower provides full views as far as the eye can see (or the smog will allow).

Outside there is a courtyard,, a long lap pool, fountains, rose gardens and a small mazelike formal garden. Madonna sold the home to commercial director Joe Pytka for $5.3 million and he has now listed the home for $14.95 million.

Experience more lush living in luxury homes and mansions or see the stars living large with celebrity homes galleries at AOL Real Estate.

From Berg Properties Big Time Listings:
--A home in the Hollywood Hills, shown above, that once belonged to Bette Davis has been listed for $2.295 million. The listing is here
--Libertarian radio and TV talk show host Larry Elder has put Hollywood Hills home on the market for $4.175 million.

From the LA Times Hot Property:
--David LaChapelle has listed his Sunset Strip home for $1.65 million. We looked at this one on Friday.
The 1928 Spanish-style home of "Gossip Girl" producer Josh Schwartz and his wife, Jill in the Los Feliz area of Los Angeles on the market for $2.395 million. The listing is here.
--Nicole Murphy, ex-wife of Eddie Murphy, has put her Calabasas home back on the market. We took a closer look on Saturday.
--Phoenix Pictures chairman and cofounder Mike Medavoy has taken his Beverly Park mansion off the market. It was most recently listed at $19.995 million but it was at $23.5 million when we checked it out as an estate of the day.

From Cityfile's Buyers and Sellers:
--Disney heiress Abigail Disney and her husband, Pierre Hauser, are paying $12.16 million for a 16th-floor apartment at 15 Madison Square North.
--Writer/director John Ridley paid $6.65 million for a condo at 15 Central Park West in July 2008, relisted it a few days later for $13 million and has cut the prices several times since then. It is currently listed for $8.5 million.
--via the NY Times, London-based investment manager Franck Ruimy has picked up five apartments since March through limited liability corporations, including four units at 400 East 67th Street, purchased for a combined $11.5 million.
--Hedge fund exec Apostolos Peristeris and his wife Alicia have sold their two-bedroom condo at 207 East 57th Street for $1.65 million.
--As we mentioned earlier this week, Leona Helmsley's former estate in Greenwich is now available for just $75 million. It was still listed at $125 million when it was our estate of the day last June.
--John Legend has reduced the price on his New York City apartment. We checked this one out earlier in the week.
--New York Observer publisher and Ivanka Trump snuggle buddy Jared Kushner has paid $3.225 million for a two-bedroom, seventh-floor condo at 21 Astor Place.
--New York Mortgage Trust founder Steven Schnall and his wife Sherri have put their townhouse at 2 North Moore Streeton the market for $33 million. Check out a video from The Real Deal here.
--Tina Fey has picked up a new apartment for $3.4 million, we checked it out earlier this week.
--Lily Lee Lee Wong has cut $4.6 million off the price of her 115-year-old townhouse at 21 East 84th Street. She bought the home for $12.1 million in June 2007 and re-listed for $24.5 million just a month later. The 22-foot wide home is now on the market for $19.9 million.
--Real estate agent Raphael De Niro, the son of Robert De Niro, and his wife Claudine paid $2.9 million for a three-bedroom condo at 497 Greenwich Street.

From the Real Estalker:
--One of our former estate of the day properties, 40 Beverly Park in Beverly Hills has been sold. It was last listed at $31.5 million but was at $39.9 million when we checked it out last November. The buyer is said to be Oksana Borzina, a real estate investor/flipper who owns several other properties in the area.
--Usher has been spotted checking out real estate on the Sunset Strip. His Atlanta home remains on the market.
--Nicolas Cage has another home in New Orleans on the market, we checked it out earlier this week.
--Producer Brad Grey has picked up a Bel Air home for a reported $22 million.
A Los Angeles home that once belonged to Dermot Mulroney and Catherine Keener is back on the market. Mulroney and Keener sold to an entity linked to a charitable organization in North Carolina that belongs to Dave Matthews (it may have belonged to Dave Matthews Band saxophonist the late LeRoi Moore). The home is now listed at $3.199 million. The listing is here.
--Serial house flipper Jeff Lewis hasn't been having great luck lately. He listed a house on Valley Oak Drive with an asking price of $3.195 million last May, it was reduced to $2.595 million and then went into contact but it has popped back up on the market for $2.695 million.

The dress that Madonna wore in the 1985 "Material Girl" video is just one of the items being auctioned off during The Fame Bureau's Rock and Roll sale on April 28. The original costume including the long satin gloves has an estimate of £60,000-80,000. And how's this for a piece of Madonna history, you can also bid on her gold American Express card (cut in half of course) that she used during the late 1980s.

The auction also includes Beatles memorabilia, signed guitars and a never-heard before recording from Jimi Hendrix including tracks for his Electric Ladyland and the Dylan track 'Tears of Rage' The tapes are expected to sell for £100,000 - £150,000.

Madonna has signed a contract to buy a four-story brick townhouse on East 81st Street in NYC for about $40 million, sources tell the New York Post. Reminiscent of a London townhouse, the 12,000-sq.-ft., 26-room classic Georgian residence (above) is notable for its extraordinary 57-foot width, making it one of the widest houses on the Upper East side. It features 13 bedrooms, 14 baths, a 3000-sq.ft. garden bordered by tall trees, rhododendron bushes and roses, and has a double-car garage, another Upper East Side rarity.

The historic mansion features a 38' x 22' drawing room with tall south windows overlooking the garden, a paneled dining room off the garden terrace, an intimate library, 11' ceilings, 9 fireplaces, a Georgian staircase, an elevator, a wine cellar with a grotto, and space for a rooftop garden. A portion of the townhouse, which currently functions as separate living quarters with its own entry, can be combined with the main residence and probably will be.

Madonna plans major renovations including significant security upgrades. "The townhouse is perfect for Madonna," a source tells the paper. "She's trying to recreate London in New York City, and this is in the style of a London townhouse." Meanwhile, the pop star is said to be searching for an English country house-style estate in the horse country of the East End of Long Island or Westchester, north of the city. As we reported recently, she has also been renting a mansion in Palm Beach.

Aging pop chameleon Madonna has reportedly moved into a lavish Palm Beach mansion (above) with her 22-year-old boytoy, Brazilian male model Jesus Luz. Madonna, 50, signed a $50,000 month-to-month lease on the 10,000-sq.-ft. house, located at he posh Palm Beach Polo and Country Club in Wellington, which is on the market for $6.5 million, the Palm Beach Post reports. The fully furnished five bedroom, seven bath mansion once belonged to BET network co-founder Sheila Johnson and is now owned by a Virginia-based private investor.

Madonna first spent two weeks in Palm Beach in January with her personal trainer and returned to hang out with polo superstar and Ralph Lauren model Nacho Figueras, who's helping her learn to play polo, the paper reports, noting she's considering buying the house. The Real Estalker adds that the back of the Spanish Colonial-style house faces the golf course and opens to a long covered terraced with gauzy curtains, a swimming pool, spa, pool pavilion and outdoor kitchen. Madonna and Jesus recently appeared in a remarkably racy photo shoot for W magazine.

Strappy, structured, and neutral, the Metallic Soft Madonna Boston Bag is one of those great-for-everyday bags. By Versace, it's made up of woven metallic grained leather with a quilted signature Greek key pattern. Bands with gold buckle hardware criss cross in every direction, accented by rolled leather handles, protective feet on the bottom, and zipper closure on the top. The interior is lined in satin and has a zip pocket. Logos are subtle but everywhere (on the front buckle and zipper pulls) so there will be no confusion as to your designer style. $4,395

On March 23rd, online jewelry retailer Bidz.com will auction off a gold and diamond tiara designed by the late Gianni Versace to benefit the Aid for AIDS charity. The one-of-a-kind tiara, which contains over 1,200 diamonds and is worth an estimated $3 million, has been worn by celebrities including Madonna, Amber Valletta and Donatella Versace. The opening bid for the precious piece is $699,000. The Versace Tiara won the famous De Beers Diamonds International Award in 1995 due to the meticulous detail and craftsmanship Gianni Versace put into creating the piece.

The tiara, the star of Versace's famous Atelier Collection, has previously been held only by private collectors. This is the first time in the history of the piece that it is being made available to the public for purchase. A substantial amount of the funds raised from the online auction will go to Aid for AIDS, a non-profit premier service provider for Los Angeles County whose mission is to provide direct financial assistance and critical support for the necessities of life to those impoverished and disabled by HIV/AIDS. Click here for more info.

While many high-end boutiques are experiencing a severe downturn, L.A.'s "luxury erotic emporium" Coco de Mer is busier than ever, with an increasing quotient of sex-starved celebs. The Melrose Avenue shop sells a wide range of goods including lingerie, books, oils, housewares and luxurious sex toys and accessories, including a $10,000 14kt gold and diamond vibrator. Angelina Jolie was spotted shopping there just the other day (though we don't know what she splurged on). Other celebs including Madonna, Kate Moss, Salma Hayek and Sienna Miller have also been by to pick up something saucy for, ahem, entertaining at home.

The shop is owned by Justine and Sam Roddick, daughters of Body Shop founder Anita Roddick, who opened the original Coco de Mer in London in 2001. The shop's clever, opulent design features a "Confessional" room attached to the dressing room providing a private view of your partner trying on lingerie. All of their products are made in consideration of the environment and human rights, and their policy is to invest in the work of local talent as well as small Fair Trade projects or cottage industries. The Roddicks are "committed to enabling individuals to use sex as an instrument to transform their own existence."

If you ever doubted Madonna's devotion to Kabbalah (and how could you really, she's been wearing that red string for years), her donations make a pretty strong statement. Fox News reports on the tax filings for her Ray of Light Foundation for 2007 which show that the singer have away $3.1 million. Most of that money, $2.6 million went to the Kabbalah Center of Los Angeles. She gave no money to her other charity, Raising Malawi, in 2007, even though that was the year she adopted her son David Banda from that country. Madonna has also given other donations including $250,000 to Mobilization Against AIDS.

It will be interesting to see what her 2008 tax filings will reveal although her biggest outgo this year was to the Guy Ritchie freedom fund.

If you are at Madonna's Christmas table you'll be drinking metal this year. The Telegraph reports that Madonna has spent £5,000 (around $7,400) on wine laced with silver for Christmas. She ordered 25 bottles of the 24k Silver wine from Artesanos del Vino in Valencia, Spain. The 24K wine is made by mixing a liquor containing silver dust into a sparkling rosé. There is also a 24K Gold version.Madonna is reportedly spending Christmas in England this year with ex-husband Guy Ritchie and her three children.

The news that Madonna is the latest star to pose for Louis Vuitton has been floating around for a week or so but now there are some more concrete details. The soon-to-be-divorced music icon will be paid a rumored $10 million to be the new face of Louis Vuitton's 2009 marketing campaign. The photographer is Steven Meisel, who Madonna has worked with many times, most famously for her naughty 1992 book, "Sex." View on Fashion has a couple pics of Madonna cozying up to a Louis bag. Filming took place this week at L.A.'s Café Figaro, and the stylist for the session was Marie Amelie Sauve, fashion editor for Vogue Paris and consultant for Balenciaga.